The weight of suffering

I know that brokenness will always be part of this life, this side of heaven.

Things are just not quite right here, are they?

Sometimes that brokenness hits me like bricks, and I feel my stomach knotting.

The other day I just cried and cried thinking about the effects of brokenness that have touched my friends and my family and me.

There is neglect, past abuse, infertility, betrayal, addictions, and death.

It felt so very heavy.  And broken.  It hurt.  and exhausted me.

My mouth opened as if crying out for help, but no words.

The tears wouldn't stop coming.

A friend of mine once asked me if I thought there was a such thing as intercessory grieving because she had wept for a friend as if it was her own pain.

I think there is such a thing as intercessory grieving.


And right now, I'm remembering this - that Jesus intercessory grieves for me when I feel pain.

That He prays to the Father for me and for us.

It's mysterious to me.  But comforting.

Comforting to remember that He was "a man of sorrows, acquainted with bitterest grief."

That He is not indifferent or immune to our sufferings.

He knows them intimately and well and actually feels them with us.  I wholeheartedly believe this.

While I'm grateful for my sheltered, carefree, relatively painless childhood, as I've grown up, I've learned what the world is really like,...the weight of brokenness that presses down on people,...even God's children,...with the threat to steal hope and leave despair.

A friend of mine in college had done a word study on the word "burden."

She told me that the Greek word for "burden" in Galations 6:2 was related to the word "knapsack."

Bear one another's burdens,

and so fulfill the law of Christ. - Gal. 6:2

While the Hebrew word for "burden" in Psalm 55:22 was related to the word "boulder."

Cast your burden on the Lord,

    and he will sustain you;
he will never permit
the righteous to be moved. - Ps. 55:22

And I thought about what I'm able to carry (in my "knapsack") and what I can't possibly carry ("boulders").  Some things are just too heavy.

Thank God He carries those.

Thinking about all these burdens, I came across this book, written by Joni Earickson Tada.  She knows a thing or two about suffering.

When God Weeps

It just came in the mail, and I'm eager to get started.  Here's part of what I've read thus far:

"This book is about God weeping over human heartache, his entering our anguish himself, and the love that drives him to let us suffer.  It's about experiencing the friendship of God along difficult paths we didn't even know he walked."

Joni 
source

I'm looking forward (I know those words may not sound appropriate) to learning more about suffering with hope, experiencing My Father's great love in the midst of heartache, and to learning how to better come alongside people who suffer.

Some of the questions that Joni wrestled with are:

• If God is loving, why is there suffering?
• What's the difference between permitting something and ordaining it?
• When bad things happen, is God in cahoots with the Devil?
• How can he expect me to be happy this way?

And no trite answers to those questions will do, will they.

Sometimes all I can see is the sadness.  But I know my view is limited.  That helps.

And when I am still, I marvel thinking back on how the comfort of His presence in my past low times really has somehow, mysteriously, been....enough.  And that I can hope that it will continue to be enough.  For me.  And for those dear to me who put their hope in Him.

Another year. Another Plaza Art Fair.

It's that time of year again!

Time for the 82nd annual Plaza Art Fair.

Last year, I attended as a Kansas City newbie and wrote about the experience here.

This year, with a year of residency under my belt, I felt right at home.

Here's a glimpse.

standing by my favorite painting of the day (the one with the leaves)

This year, I kept gravitating towards calm, nature-y paintings.

This one was part of a "clouds" collection.

(pardon the reflection)

I thought this one was fun.  It just evokes "Girls Weekend Getaway" doesn't it?  That would be a good title for it, I think.

And the drippy paint acting like rain in this one bid me stare at it, even though it's a very different feel from the happy one above.

kind of mesmerizing

She had a whole collection like that.

Another artist was displaying these, made from clay.  Matt wasn't a fan, but I thought the white-on-white was somehow appealing.

There was no shortage of sculptures.  Made from all kinds of materials.

I've been into blues and greens lately, so these paintings attracted my attention, even if they might be considered boring (and easy to come by) compared to the conversation pieces in the other booths.

It was perfect weather for sitting in the grass and eating lunch by the water (which, regrettably, I didn't do).  No wind.  Low 70s.  Clear.  Perfect.











So here's to you, Plaza Art Fair!  You did not disappoint and did a fine job ushering in Fall.

Little Known Facts about Kansas City

When I first learned I was moving to Kansas City and told my friends I was moving to Kansas City, these images came to my mind (and I'm pretty sure to some of theirs):

source

source

source

Those top pictures, I think, are rather pretty and serene.  

While I appreciate wide, open spaces and unspoiled views of nature and would be open to "living off the land" (given that there's a Target within reasonable driving distance), and while there are fields and farms outside the city that produce needed crops and resources...

this is Kansas City:

source

Big city folk may not find it to be the boomingest metropolis (humbly 29th on the list of large urban cities in America), but I have come to respect it as the hidden Midwestern gem that it is.  There is plenty to do here for the part homebody/part adventurer like me.

It's not so big and crowded that the traffic is unbearable, and it has a decent amount of local attractions.  The downtown is walkable, and the people are friendly.

I grew up outside of Atlanta and have found that, with any city, there are parts you are happy to show visitors and parts that you tend to avoid. Since my target audience today is prospective tourists, this post is dedicated to talking up Kansas City and temporarily ignoring the crime, meth problem, and poor public educational system (I don't mean to minimize those issues; it's just not what this post is about today).

So let's get on with it, shall we?

Ten fun facts I have learned about Kansas City:

1. It's the largest city in Missouri.
2. It is on the Missouri/Kansas border, thus both states claim Kansas City as their own. (And if I'm intuiting correctly, there seems to be a bit of a rivalry between the KS side and the MO side.)
   
3. The Missouri River runs through it - the same fateful river that Lewis and Clark traveled to explore the western frontier back in the 1800s.

   

   statue commemorating that dynamic duo, Lewis and Clark
4. It has one of the most affordable housing markets in the country and is home to a little over 2 million people.
5. With over 200 fountains, second in number only to Rome, Kansas City is nicknamed "The City of Fountains."  WHO KNEW??  Click here if you're interested in seeing the Kansas City fountains website.  Here's a sampling:
   
   
   
   The first time I walked by this one, I said out loud to Matt,
   "Now is that really appropriate?"
   
   
   
   
   

   
   

   

   my personal favorite fountain

6. KC has over 100 art galleries.  And on the First Friday of every month, there is a 40 gallery art crawl in the Crossroads District with street performers and food and drink samples at funky local shops.  This event is affectionately known by locals as "First Fridays."
7. Kansas City was selected as one of America's Best Downtowns by Forbes Magazine. (And again, who knew???)
8. Though some may argue with this, it's considered the BBQ capital of the world with more BBQ joints per capita than any other city in the nation.

9. 

   Standing in line for good bbq at Oklahoma Joe's

   
   
   
   

   We made the mistake of going to this iconic BBQ place for the first time during the MLB All-star Game, which was held in KC the summer we moved there.  We waited in line for 1 hour and 45 minutes.  About 30 minutes into it, we considered leaving.  I'm glad we didn't.  It's a rite of passage to wait in the Oklahoma Joe's line.  And when I started to feel bad about our spot in line, a quick glance back at all the people behind us cured my outlook...

   

   The jam session originated in Kansas City - Jazz musicians would gather after their gigs and play together into the wee hours of the morning.
   This summer, we took Matt's sister and her husband to the historic Phoenix jazz lounge to see what it was like.  I was pleasantly impressed by the level of talent we heard.
   
   
   At one point, a lady went up to the stage to sing.  I mistook her for an overeager crowd member who just wanted to seize the mic, and thought to myself, "Oh no, this is going to be a trainwreck..."
   
   
   But then, she opened her mouth and started singing Ella Fitzgerald's "Savoy"  And she was spot-on.  Jazzy, smooth, pitch perfect.  Impressive! I judged her too quickly.
   

   

   
   

10. 
    
11. 
    

10. In 1910, Joyce Hall began selling postcards out of a shoebox in KC. Today,his company has grown to the world’s largest greeting-cards maker, Hallmark Cards. Hallmark's Headquarters are in KC.

________________________________________________________________________________

So who wants to come and visit? :)

You can stay at our humble apartment and hear the sirens going by.  Just kidding.  But seriously, you will probably hear sirens at some point.  And yet, we love our apartment.  And we would love to have you in it.

Here are some summer guests we have enjoyed:

The Goodlins

The Daggetts

The Spahns

If you visit, we might tootle around Zona Rosa shopping mall...

tootling with the Goodlins

Or play Dutch Blitz at home ....

Beware, things can get intense.

Or go the City Market....

Checking out the City Market with Tom and Cindy

Or take you to our favorite Thai restaurant...

At Lulu's with Eric and Jill

Aside:
Matt's sister Jill is married to his college best friend Eric, which makes hanging out with them extra special.  To get a taste of Eric's personality, I've included a little picture that explains more than I can write.

Our brother-in-law Eric (left) and his brother being themselves

That's all she wrote!

School Days: Mummifying a chicken in 2nd grade

In honor of school being back in full swing, here's a little "School Days" post from last year that I forgot to publish.  Enjoy.

_______________________________________________________________________

We are currently studying Ancient Egypt in 2nd grade.  What a fascinating time period.

After reading in depth about the mummification process, we are now in the process of mummifying a chicken.  You read that right.  We are mummifying a chicken.

Shocking maybe, but this is actually my very first chicken mummifying experience.  Where have I been?!

The whole process, I read, takes 6 weeks.  We are on week 2.

As we were handling the chicken with latex gloves, I just kept thinking, "Please don't cause a salmonella outbreak, please don't cause a salmonella outbreak,..."

Here is said chicken, after being packed in "natron" (salt mixure in zip lock bag), then oiled and wrapped by my students.

Mmmm

It is an involved process.  Perhaps a little too involved.  But too late now!  We're 2 weeks in, and the children love it, so there's no going back!

Ancient Egyptians removed a mummy's organs and preserved them in canopic jars like these:

source

I looked online to see if I could purchase some imitation jars on the cheap but was unsuccessful, so I decided to make some.

Materials:

- Air-dry clay

- Empty pint sized ice cream containers

- Pencil (or any sharp stylus-like tool)

Step 1. Secure clay to lids.

Step 2. Pile clay atop, smooth, and form heads of Ancient Egyptian gods.

Step 3. Use sharp pencil to add details.

The one that I'm detailing here is supposed to be a baboon, but I think it looks more like E.T.

Step 4. Let air dry for 1-2 days.

Step 5. Paint with acrylic paints if desired.  (I didn't)

Step 6. Wrap construction paper around containers.

(pic to come)

Step 7. Remove chicken's organs, wrap individually, and place inside jars.

Then, after the interesting demonstration, when the children are at P.E., promptly remove the organs from the jars and throw them in the trashcan, because you don't want your classroom to stink.

In case you have been ceaselessly wondering how to mummify a chicken (I'm sure it's just a matter of time before it explodes all over Pinterest), I found the instructions from The Story of the World accompanying Activity Book (my favorite history curriculum).

_________________________________________________________________________________

We ended our study with an "Ancient Egyptian Day" where we enjoyed a feast (mmm...hummus...) and the students presented their final projects. They did a great job.

Coincidentally, fourth grade was having their "Medieval Day" (or was it Renaissance Day?) at the same time.

Fourth grade teacher and our fearless Elementary Coordinator, Sara.
Love this girl.

My personal scripture reading today was Colossians 1.  And in it I read,

"Epaphras, our much loved co-worker, was the one who brought you the Good News.  He is Christ's faithful servant, and he is helping us..."     - Colossians 1:7

Epaphras.  Not a name that rings a bell for me.  I've read Colossians before, but I must have read over his name quickly and forgotten about him.  That happens all the time for me.

Too bad I never gave much thought to him before, because he sounded like a great guy, a "much loved co-worker" it says.  A "faithful servant" who "helps."

I imagine him to be a team-player, likable, and effective at his job.

Have I mentioned that I love the people I work with?  It's no secret here that our building needs some fixin up, but the PEOPLE, I must say, are fantastic.  They are faithful servants. And very helpful.  Warm, professional, gracious, competent, and smart.

My much-loved co-workers.

* a few people are not represented in this picture

I know it would be much cuter and more interesting to see pictures of the children, but I hesitate to post pictures of children without asking for parental consent.  So, in lieu of them, you'll have to bear with pictures of us teachers.  Thrilling, I know.  Maybe in the future, I'll post some face-censored shots of my students.

I look forward to sharing more "School Days" posts!

And best wishes to all my fellow teacher friends out there as you begin a new school year!

Tangent Story on the phrase "Best Wishes"

Matt recently overheard me genuinely but awkwardly tell our moving-out neighbor (who we had met only once or twice in passing), "Well...Best Wishes on your new place!" to which the guy flatly responded, "...uh,...thhhanks."

I don't know why I said it.  But I felt like I needed to say something as I saw him moving his stuff out of his apartment.  And "Best wishes on your new place!" came out.

Why I'm sharing this with you?  I blame it on the pressure and desensitization effect of social media.

Matt said it was one of the most awkward, hilarious things he had heard me say.  We're still laughing about it and sometimes will call out from another room to each other, "Best wishes on your new place!" 

Ahhh, we love to laugh at ourselves.  Are we the only ones that find this funny?